I have traveled the entire world, read every book and attended countless therapies in order to heal. Through all of this experience, I have learned that if you do not want the help— if you do not believe—you will not heal.
Healing does not come when you chase it, it comes when you are quiet enough to listen. My parents took me all the way to Brazil to see a Seeing Eye “doctor” called John of God. John of God—real name João Teixeira de Faria—was a Brazilian faith healer who claimed to channel spirits to perform invisible surgeries without tools or anesthesia. He ran a center in Abadiânia (until the Me Too movement got him in twenty-eighteen because apparently the eighty-year-old man was sexually harassing women during his procedures) drawing thousands of desperate people—cancer patients, chronic pain sufferers, even celebrities—hoping for miracles. My parents wanted this miracle to happen for me us.
John of God would go into trances, say he was guided by dead doctors or saints, then operate by pressing fingers into eyes, scraping skin, or just waving hands. Some swore it worked: tumors vanished, backs straightened, pain gone. Others called it placebo at best, fraud at worst.
I was in the placebo group and I can confirm that I was not mentally ready to take in any miracles or will his strategies to work. I was just along for the ride. Not understanding why this was happening to me but knowing that it would get better.
I mean— the place was magnificent. Abadiânia is a little mountain-top village; there are no giant statues of Jesus Christ. Throughout the night, you can hear the stray cats fighting and roosters crow in order wake you every morning— as if it is an order. We had to wear all white clothing (this is best for letting in the spirit world). We wrote down our prayers/ wishes every day and stood in long lines in order to visit with John of God. We were prescribed herbal remedies and crystal “baths”— in which you lay in a tanning-like bed amongst the crystals for hours. I could not wrap my head around the fact that every single “patient” would be given the same prescription— despite their ailment. How could that help you if it was not designed specifically to your needs?
Now I understand that it is all about intention. I can consume the same herbs as you but— for me— tumors would shrink/disappear and I would be cured of my paralysis, but others bones would be healed and bleeding would stop— with the same herbs. I guess sacred does not always mean that it is holy, because I would pray. For years, I was searching for a higher power, but I was asking the wrong questions. Healing is not always gentle— sometimes you need to be shoved. Life has shoved and shoved— now I am ready to listen.
Kat’s Musings 